Friday, April 8, 2011

Dreams

It is not an exaggeration when I say I haven't slept through the night since the third trimester of my first child...seven and a half years ago. There have only been a handful of nights where I enjoyed uninterrupted sleep for more than four hours. Recently, we have made progress in this department and I am actually reaching a level of sleep where I dream again.

Of course, my first dream in seven and a half years was a busy, bizarre non-sequitor that left me exhausted and confused when I awoke.

Dreams have been on my mind lately. I starting thinking about dreams in the sense of goals, aspirations, desires.

At seventeen, I dreamed that I would be a rock star/actress/russian translator, living in LA or Moscow.

In my twenties, I dreamed that I would meet Prince Charming and be rich rich rich living in a castle, with my fabulous best seller topping the charts.

(In my thirties, I was too busy for dreaming.)

Now, as I begin my forties, I wonder if my seventeen and twenty year old selves would be much disappointed that none of her dreams came true. I moved two miles from my childhood home, I am not an actress and the only russian I learned was from watching Sean Connery in "Hunt for Red October." I did not write my best seller. I do not live in a castle.

However, I did marry Prince Charming*, gave birth to two beautiful princesses and have riches that money can't buy. And I am happy. Contentment wraps around me like a snuggie fresh from the dryer.**

I'll still dream about the future, but I'll do so without regret for those dreams that might not come true. Now, if I could just get Dave to build me that castle.

*Actually, Prince Philip. He was more my romantic style. Dancing in the woods and all that.
**I do not actually own a snuggie. Maybe in my fifties.

6 comments:

Kristina P. said...

My dream is that everyone owns a Snuggie.

Kellie said...

When they come up with an electric Snuggie, that's when it's time to buy. I'm so glad you have lived your life being a wife and mother- that's worth so much more than an acting career or a cold empty castle.

Melissa (A Gracious Calm) said...

I was sick this past weekend (well, still am) and I had the strangest dreams. It was weird. I normally don't really remember them but it was weird and real like.

Heather said...

Snuggies are cool. I think you should look into it.
And you will need one if you ever DO get that castle. Drafty.

Deidra Faith said...

Laurie, you need a snuggie! I got one for Christmas. I LOVE it!!! It's great when I'm curled up reading a book. Definitely invest in one. You'll love it!!!

M-Cat said...

Countess - a snuggie might be a deal breaker for us. That doesn't make me popular in the blog world, but I really think they are stupid.

Keep dreaming friend - and no matter what, you have your prince charming and your darling little family so really, anything else is frosting on the cake right?